Friday, March 30, 2012
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Also, they showed a silly tweet from Your Party Host, complete with Mickey York reading it. Made my day since I’m an attention whore nerd.
But that isn’t the complete story. There were other finalists for the job. And luckily, once again, DNR is the leader in stupid Tigers coverage and I have uncovered the test screenings for the guys that just didn’t make the cut to join Field on the FSD broadcasts.
Take a look.
Monday, March 26, 2012
Well, it took until 2005, but they went out and got that player, giving him the second largest contract in Tigers history at that time. He was coming off of a knee injury and many predicted that it was a poor decision by the Tigers. They were wrong.
The player was Magglio Ordonez and he would go on to have several great years with the Tigers, hit one of the greatest home runs in baseball history, and become my favorite player in the process. And today he tweeted that he is close to retirement.
I’ve been putting it off, but it’s once again time for me to say goodbye to a Tiger hero.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
CHRISTINE: /rips off mask
Word is, Miguel Cabrera has a small fracture on his head spot. He'll only miss a couple weeks and should be good to go for Opening Day. So climb off that ledge. No need to jump quite yet. It was a freak injury that could only happen to a Detroit Tiger. And you know...YOU KNOW that deep down, Brandon Inge took pleasure in it. He had to.
Why couldn't this happen to Derek Jeter? I'd pay to see that.
Monday, March 19, 2012
If you are one of these new fans, I bid you welcome. Thank you for choosing the Detroit Tigers as your team instead of an easier, and more annoying, team to support like the Yankees or Red Sox. While this decision does not assure the world that you are a good and decent person, it improves the odds since Yankee and Red Sox fans are all filthy heathens who should be shot out of a catapult into a brick wall.
Now as a new Tiger fan, you may not be familiar with how you are supposed to act toward your adopted team. That is why I, Your Trusted Party Host, am here to help guide you. As someone that has observed Tiger fans in person, online, and at the ballpark for well over twenty years, there are some certain guidelines you need to follow to be accepted by other fans. Note that many, if not all, of these rules do not apply to us fans that have been here long before 2006. We are all grandfathered (and grandmothered) in by the common sense rules that no longer seem to apply today.
So get a pen and paper handy and take notes. Lord knows you don’t want to be caught cheering for a player like Ryan Raburn in front of other Tiger fans. You may end up being beaten to death in the parking lot, or even worse, trolled online by some lifeless putz that claims to have went to college with Don Kelly. I wouldn’t wish that one anyone.
Here we go.
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Thursday, March 15, 2012
But it got me to thinking. What if I put together a 64-man tournament featuring the greatest 64 Tigers of all time? After seeding each player, I’d go through the tournament on a Player X vs. Player Y basis and narrow down the list to the single greatest man to ever wear the Old English D? Well yippie, that’s what I did. I sometimes have free time at work when I should be doing something dumb like actually working.
Top seeds were given to the eleven players that have their names printed on the walls in the outfield of Comerica Park. From there, I worked my way from the top to the bottom seeding guys where I thought they should go. Obviously, narrowing down a group of players from the thousands that have played in Detroit over the past 100+ years down to 64 is not an easy task and thus not everyone could make it. So I’m sure I left out some guys that many of you will be grumpy about. Deal with it, whiners.
Winners were chosen on a combination of stats, the Tigers record book, longevity in the D, contribution to the franchise, and their overall place in Tiger history. I don’t expect you to agree with all my choices, but I’m doing my best to be fair throughout. Otherwise, Bobby Higginson would win this thing and no one other than me would be amused with that.
The 64 players are broken down to four 16-man regions: the Hughie Jennings region, the Steve O’Neill region, the Mayo Smith region, and the Sparky Anderson region. I apologize for not having a full tournament bracket for you to view, but that’s beyond my caveman skills. Instead, I’ll go through the tournament region by region until we reach the Final Four and the eventual winner. I hope you enjoy it.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Monday, March 12, 2012
Sunday, March 11, 2012
But about that “writing just to write something” thing. Did you see Tom Gage’s bit at the News site? “Homer only adds to Don Kelly’s versatility”?
Yup. Here we go again. Luckily, it’s very short.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
And anyhoooo...with the Tigers being such heavy favorites to win the AL Central this year, several lazy journalists have pointed out how it’s similar to 2008 when Detroit was also a big favorite. As we all know, that team finished at the back of the pack with a 74-88 record. Also, that team was nothing like this one, if you take into account things like logic and a simple understanding of baseball.
That 2008 team had dreadful pitching. It had multiple guys on the wrong sides of their primes. Comparing the ’08 team to this group is like comparing apples and tampons, in my opinion.
But I could be wrong. Maybe I’ve been sniffing too much glue this week. (Is it possible to sniff too MUCH glue? So intoxicating…)
The only fair way to figure this out is in what we call around these parts a nice CATFIGHT. 2008 Tigers vs. 2012 Tigers. Bring it.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
We’ll cover some old faces, some new ones, and how they all size up against Detroit. While the Tigers are currently the overwhelming favorites to win the Central, like the good boy scouts they are, they need to be prepared. Thank goodness I’m here.
Friday, March 2, 2012
Now this Tiger team, despite being universal favorites to win the AL Central and maybe more, are not without their share of question marks. In fact, I can’t remember a recent season with a team having so many of them going into it.
Some are obvious, some are not. But below I have listed the many points of interest that we will be getting the answers to over the next several days, weeks, and months.